When most people think of rape, they usually envision an attack by a stranger who jumps out of a dark secluded area and sexually assaults an individual. The sorry truth is it’s not only strangers who rape. About half of all people raped know the person who attacked them. Girls and women are most often the victims of these attacks, but boys and men can be raped also.
The majority of dates, acquaintances and friendships never lead to violence. When it does occur and forced sex is the result, it has become known as date rape or acquaintance rape. No one has the right to force an individual to have sex against their will. This is true in a casual acquaintance, as well as any stage of friendship and even within a marriage. Rape has nothing to do with love and it is not about sex or passion. Rape is an act of aggression and violence and as such is against the law.
The myth that someone might have been ‘asking for it’, is a lie. Rape is always the fault of the rapist and the person who is raped, is never at blame. Healthy relationships always involve respect. That includes respect of the other person’s feelings. Someone who respects you will never pressure you or force you to have sex.
Quite often alcohol and/or drugs are involved with date rape. Drinking loosens inhibitions, dulls common sense, and in some cases allows aggressive tendencies to surface. Drugs that are considered ‘date rape’ drugs such as Rohypnol, GHB and Ketamine, can easily be mixed in drinks to make a person black out and forget things that happen. Mixing these drugs with alcohol is very dangerous and can kill.
To protect yourself avoid secluded places and don’t spend time with someone who makes you feel uneasy. Stay sober and if you are out drinking, guard your drink at all times and do not accept drinks from strangers. It is better to go out with several close friends and agree before heading out to leave as a group. If someone is making you feel uneasy or if you feel threatened ask for help immediately. Make others aware of your concern. Self-defense courses can help to build confidence and teach you techniques to escape from an attacker but common sense and being alert of your surroundings is just as valuable.
If you are injured, go straight to the ER. Call a friend or family member for support. Report the rape to the police right away. Write down as much as you remember about the attack and the attacker. If you aren’t sure what to do, call a rape crisis center. Any phonebook will have a hotline number. While rape may cause physical damage, it is emotionally traumatic as well. Consider talking to a trained rape crisis counselor or other mental health professional that can get you started in the healing process. Working through things now can help prevent lingering problems later on.
If you need help, are struggling with an addiction, or know of someone who is, please contact A Better Tomorrow today. We are here to help.
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