When most people think of rape, they usually envision an attack by a stranger who jumps out of a dark secluded area and sexually assaults an individual. The sorry truth is it’s not only strangers who rape. About half of all people raped know the person who attacked them. Girls and women are most often the victims of these attacks, but boys and men can be raped also.
The majority of dates, acquaintances and friendships never lead to violence. When it does occur and forced sex is the result, it has become known as date rape or acquaintance rape. No one has the right to force an individual to have sex against their will. This is true in a casual acquaintance, as well as any stage of friendship and even within a marriage. Rape has nothing to do with love and it is not about sex or passion. Rape is an act of aggression and violence and as such is against the law.
The myth that someone might have been ‘asking for it’, is a lie. Rape is always the fault of the rapist and the person who is raped, is never at blame. Healthy relationships always involve respect. That includes respect of the other person’s feelings. Someone who respects you will never pressure you or force you to have sex.
Quite often alcohol and/or drugs are involved with date rape. Drinking loosens inhibitions, dulls common sense, and in some cases allows aggressive tendencies to surface. Drugs that are considered ‘date rape’ drugs such as Rohypnol, GHB and Ketamine, can easily be mixed in drinks to make a person black out and forget things that happen. Mixing these drugs with alcohol is very dangerous and can kill.
To protect yourself avoid secluded places and don’t spend time with someone who makes you feel uneasy. Stay sober and if you are out drinking, guard your drink at all times and do not accept drinks from strangers. It is better to go out with several close friends and agree before heading out to leave as a group. If someone is making you feel uneasy or if you feel threatened ask for help immediately. Make others aware of your concern. Self-defense courses can help to build confidence and teach you techniques to escape from an attacker but common sense and being alert of your surroundings is just as valuable.
If you are injured, go straight to the ER. Call a friend or family member for support. Report the rape to the police right away. Write down as much as you remember about the attack and the attacker. If you aren’t sure what to do, call a rape crisis center. Any phonebook will have a hotline number. While rape may cause physical damage, it is emotionally traumatic as well. Consider talking to a trained rape crisis counselor or other mental health professional that can get you started in the healing process. Working through things now can help prevent lingering problems later on.
If you need help, are struggling with an addiction, or know of someone who is, please contact A Better Tomorrow today. We are here to help.
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That's a really scary thought. I go drinking with acquaintences occasionally and thank God nothing like this has ever happened. I don't believe I'll be able to do it anymore. If I do, I know I'll be looking at each of them, wondering if they are capable of this kind of deception.
ReplyDeleteYou do not have to be out drinking for this to happen. I recently published the true account of a Texas woman who was stalked, drugged and raped by a former FBI agent in her own home. He used advanced satellite surveillance technology to stalk her and placed rohypnol in her bottled water and tea bags at home. She was repeatedly drugged and gang-raped. If you feel you're being followed or stalked make sure to check your food and drinks at home as well. A New Breed: Satellite Terrorism in America is available at Barnes and Noble or at www.satweapons.com Dr. Hall
ReplyDeleteMakes me want to reconsider going to a bar to listen to my favorite band.
ReplyDeleteI was never one to go to bars anyway, but if I had been, this would sure make me reconsider. They say you never really know anyone, and I believe that.
ReplyDeleteThis is pretty indicative of the times we're living in. Noone is satisfied with anything anymore. People are so self centered it's pathetic. There are plenty of eager participants available and still they feel they have to drug someone? I guess partly it's about the power it gives them. Sad and sick if you ask me.
ReplyDeleteI often wondered why they couldn't taste something that was added to their drink, now I know. I have learned to be more watchful in public places.
ReplyDeleteMy friends and I have made a pact that we will not go out unless at least 2 of us are together. No blind dates unless it's a double. We watch each others backs, never leaving the table at the same time. If there is ever a time when our drinks are out of sight, we get new ones.
ReplyDeleteI know why people say some women are just asking for it, but it still makes me angry. Rape is all about power for the perp. While some targets may be easier to peg, they still don't deserve the degredation of rape.
ReplyDeleteI have a feeling most women who find themselves in this situation went home to shower instead of the ER. I know that would be my first instinct.
ReplyDeleteI may be paranoid, but I don't go to bars anymore. I may get together with a couple of girl friends, or even 2 or 3 couples, but if the gathering is not going to be at someones home, I don't go.
ReplyDeleteWhy would someone resort to this when the streets are lined with women who are willing to get involved. I didn't mean hookers either. There are a lot of loose women out there.
ReplyDeleteI'm in my 60's now, but I remember a friend of mine had someone slip something into her drink when she was in college. So, I guess date rape drugs aren't anything new, just becoming more popular.
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