Relationships can be like a drug. Have you heard the term serial dater? It is a person who will date someone for a few weeks during the happy go lucky feel good time when adrenaline is at a high and then as soon as the adrenaline rush starts to dim, boom – the relationship is ended and a new one begins. They do this to get the high feeling that new relationships bring. It is a form of addiction.
Realistically relationships have their ups and downs. It is the commitment to work through the bad that makes a relationship strong. Yes, in the beginning a relationship is fun and exciting full of first and new things and feelings. However, as a relationship ages, those feelings do dim. It may go through stages of highs and lows depending on what is going on around each individual. They can be painful and they can be exhilarating. A stable relation will have highs and low, with the highest percentage of it being just even toned where each partner is happy and comfortable with the other. You will bicker over laundry duties or other insignificant things, and argue over bigger things. You will work out duty details and through disagreements. There can be many things that bring your relationship to those exhilarating moments and just as many things that can bring it to a low. As long as your relationship isn’t like a roller-coaster out of control, you probably have a fairly healthy if not healthy relationship.
However, if it is full of constant battles that repeat regardless of makeup’s you are swimming in troubled waters. One of the biggest obstacles in recovery is placing unrealistic expectations on ones self, others and relationships. It is easy to become carried away with romantic fantasy of the future with a new relationship but when they do not pan out, the hurt hits and your recovery can be in jeopardy if you do not know how to work through it or have people to talk to during the difficult time. It is true relationships can add happiness to ones life, but in order for this to happen, you already have to be happy with where your life is at. You cannot expect a relationship to take you out of a slump. It may for a minute but only because it is new. Once the newness wears off, the slump will return. Relationships remain healthy because both parties are committed to keeping it healthy and happy. It is a dual effort and work.
If you need help, are struggling with an addiction, or know of someone who is, please contact A Better Tomorrow Treatment Center today. We are here to help.
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http://www.24houraddictionhelp.org/
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I've never heard the term 'serial dater' before, but as soon as I heard it, my brother came to mind. That's exactly what he does. After 1 or 2 dates he's 'in love' like never before. Within 6 months, he can't stand her, or she can't stand him and they part ways. Then he's on the hunt again.
ReplyDeleteIf you're working at the relationship, it doesn't get that dull. If it does, try harder! Anything worth having is worth fighting for. Think about the early days and remember what made you fall for that person. It's probably one of the reasons you stay.
ReplyDeleteThere are some instances where 2 people just don't belong together, regardless of the situation. My neighbors are a perfect example. They are both physically volatile with each other. They remind me of the movie WAR OF THE ROSES. In there case, there ought to be a law to protect the rest of the neighborhood.
ReplyDeleteI know that relationships have their ups and downs but it seems that I have way more downs than ups. I've made an appt with a therapist to talk about it. I really love the girl I'm seeing but I'm beginning to think we're not meant for each other.
ReplyDeleteThere are some days when I think no relationship is realistic, but thankfully those days are few and far between. I've really learned to go with the flow and I'm a much happier person than I used to be.
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